croik

WHAT DO SINGLE WOMEN DO ON VALENTINES!?

WE WRITE GODDAMN PORN, THAT'S WHAT!!!

Fandom: Inception
Title: Side Effects Include: Inception
Rating: NC-17
Words: 10,850
Pairings/Characters: Eames/Robert, with appearances by the rest of the team.
Warnings: GRAPHIC GAY SEX. And drug use, sort of. We can debate whether Somnacin is considered an illegal drug, but in this fic, they're shooting it up, so yeah, I guess you'd call that DRUG USE.
Disclaimer: These characters and setting do not belong to me and are being used without permission but for no profit. LUCKILY.
Summary: Mid-Movie What-if. The night before the big job, Eames checks up on Robert and discovers you don't need Inception to ruin a man's life for the better.
Notes: WHAT YOU NEED IS COCK

( Read more... )

So over the weekend TK and I watched The Take (pattern continuing), a British drama starring Tom Hardy. It was dark and pretty good, if not a bit predictable. But I think Hardy might have been miscast, because he was amazing and his performance made Freddy easily the most interesting character in the show. Which wouldn't be bad except that Freddy is a despicable human being, and it's kind of awkward rooting for him, especially after...yeah. Eurggghhhhhh. After he made his exit I almost wanted to just shut it off 'cause I didn't really care what happened to anyone else. And how horrible is THAT??

"So damn interesting that you forget he's Not A Good Guy" seems to be a theme for all the Tom Hardy things I've seen so far :B Doubt that'll hold up by the time I get to Flood, hah.

In any case, I yoinked some caps and did something dumb of the Eames/Robert variety.

( If you've seen The Take this might skeev you right out, but otherwise, it's just silly )

Fuck. Saw the new GK2 updates and all I can say is fuck, I'm so....ugh. I can't stand it. Do Not Want, in caps. I'm sure everyone's excited but I can't even look, because it's just such a bad sign for the franchise, I mean seriously. If I talk to anyone who's excited about it now I'm gonna lose my nachos. I'm just so irritated I'm mostly incoherent right now, I went to bed mad at the entirety of the internet. Which is so stupid, I know, how can something so dumb make you so grumbly.

And that's it: I'm not pissed, really, I'm just a horrible grump of a grinch. Capcom...I am disappoint.

Gonna go update now. Pfft.

Over the weekend TK and I went on a movie binge, and watched Red Eye, Perrier's Bounty, RockNRolla, and Bronson. Some of you may notice a pattern in our selections. At the end of it we declared Bronson the undisputed champion of the event, for pulverizing the competition in both the literal and metaphorical sense, being hilarious and demented and for Tom Hardy's crazy-awesome performance. But the single best moment was, perhaps, a little gem of a segment tucked in Bronson's special features. In fact I suspect you haven't even read the above because you've already been hypnotized by its infinite-looping splendor.



Can you look away? DARE YOU LOOK AWAY??

You are welcome.

( Another under the cut )

I just finished Vanquish. Like, just now--the credits are still running. It was a Christmas gift and it was probably the most boring action game I've ever played. How can you yawn your way through a sequence where you have to powerslide across a suspended highway that's falling apart beneath you? I dunno, but I did. Yawn yawn yawn. Oh, and thanks Platinum, for the desperate attempt at relevancy with your "economic stimulus package" BS. That really brightened up the non-existant plot and puddle deep characters, thanks.

It's at this point where I stop to think about what a disappointment Platinum games has turned out to be. Bayonetta was a servicable action game but it felt so pointless, muddled, and desperate for attention. Madworld was great fun but repetative, eye-raping, and short. Vanquish is death-inducingly dull. Dunno about their other game but I'm not interested. I expected a lot more from them.

At this point I stop to wonder why I expected a lot more from them. Okami was fantastic, that much I could never question. But I wasn't a big fan of Viewtiful Joe (the little that I played) and I sold God Hand back right after I beat it. The only reason I was sad about Clover going under was, ultimately, that it meant Okami would never get a sequel (and...now it has one, though I'm sure it's nothing compared to the original). And knowing that Platinum couldn't make an Okami sequel, what was I really expecting from them? I'm not sure anymore.

I read they have a fifth game in the works to be published by Sega but my expectations are low. And that makes me sad.

So the other day I got this call from Cobb's agent, and he was all, "Did you even see the movie? Do you remember who the protagonist was?" And I was like, "HOSHI- you're right, sorry." And long story short...

Fandom: Inception
Title: The Helix Trap
Chapter: 9/19 (7,700 words) (For other parts please check my My main post.
Rating: R
Pairings/Characters: Eames/Robert, Arthur/Ariadne, Cobb, Yusuf, Saito, Browning, and others.
Warnings: Violence, sexual content.
Disclaimer: These characters and setting do not belong to me and are being used without permission but for no profit
Summary: After the Inception proves successful, Eames tracks down Robert out of concern for its unusual side effects. Meanwhile, Arthur is hired to a dangerous job that forces the rest of the team to take sides: whether to defend Robert and his fragile mind, or ruin him completely.
Notes: C&C Welcome and appreciated. Thanks to my beta chypie for her input!

ruins_of_sodom made some fanart of the Helix prologue, here! And speaking of fanart, anyone else signing up for i_reversebang? I've never done a challenge like this before, I can't wait :D

( In which Cobb gets Incepted and he barely even realizes )

To Chapter 10

I've canabalized my buffer to post this, because I felt bad about taking a break from it to work on something else. I hope you like it~

Fandom: Inception
Title: The Helix Trap
Chapter: 8/19 (5,960 words) (For other parts please check my My main post.
Rating: R
Pairings/Characters: Eames/Robert, Arthur/Ariadne, Cobb, Yusuf, Saito, Browning, and others.
Warnings: Violence, sexual content.
Disclaimer: These characters and setting do not belong to me and are being used without permission but for no profit
Summary: After the Inception proves successful, Eames tracks down Robert out of concern for its unusual side effects. Meanwhile, Arthur is hired to a dangerous job that forces the rest of the team to take sides: whether to defend Robert and his fragile mind, or ruin him completely.
Notes: C&C Welcome and appreciated. Thanks to my beta chypie for her input! This chapter is slightly more "mature" than those before it so I hope you're here for the slash as well as the A/A, lol.

EDIT: hungryspider did some adorable fanart inspired by this chapter. Check it out!

( In which everything that gets mentioned once gets mentioned twice )

To Chapter 9

Now that Yuletide is over I can post what I did! This was written for d_sieya.

Fandom: Uncharted
Title: Somewhere Between An 8 And A 12
Rating: PG-13 because someone gets shot in the head.
Pairings/Characters: Nate/Elena
Disclaimer: These characters and setting do not belong to me and are being used without permission but for no profit
Summary: Nate and Elena share a "romantic" moment while hunting for treasure and running for their lives. Comments welcome and appreciated.

( Ball and chain, here we come )

When I was Googling for a "trendy Sydney restaurant" I came to this site which uses a pinwheel in its logo. And my face was like this:

D:

Fandom: Inception
Title: The Helix Trap
Chapter: 6/19 (7,600 words) (For other parts please check my my main post.
Rating: R
Pairings/Characters: Eames/Robert, Arthur/Ariadne, Cobb, Yusuf, Saito, Browning, and others.
Warnings: Violence, sexual content.
Disclaimer: These characters and setting do not belong to me and are being used without permission but for no profit
Summary: After the Inception proves successful, Eames tracks down Robert out of concern for its unusual side effects. Meanwhile, Arthur is hired to a dangerous job that forces the rest of the team to take sides: whether to defend Robert and his fragile mind, or ruin him completely.
Notes: C&C Welcome and appreciated. Thanks to my beta chypie for her input!


( In Which Eames Lost All The Footballs )

Whoaaaaaaaa did you see Top Chef? Can't believe it! That shit was bananas! She was like...whoa. WHOA. Meltdown! (trying not to spoil since I'm posting minutes after the ep). Top Chef All Stars is NOT PLAYING.

Also, hey guys, it's APATOSAURUS, NOT BRONTOSAURUS. Jeez you're in a musuem, get it right! *shakes head in shame*

Also also, Dale reminds me of a big gay Tom Hardy who cooks delicious food. I don't know why this is. Cannot unsee. And no I'm not posting comparison pics because then you'll see how little they look like each other.